Thanksgiving in West Texas

Abby took her third flight in her young life out to West Texas for Thanksgiving to visit her cousins and aunt and uncle. We don't usually go out there until Christmas, but because I used all my vacation time earlier this year to spend time with Abby after I brought her home from Guatemala, we went for Thanskgiving since my company gives us a company holiday the day after Thankgiving.

Traveling with Abby is starting to be quite the adventure. The girl simply does not like to be constrained in any form or fashion, so going in, I was glad the flight was under an hour. I think I burned close to 1,000 calories each way trying to wrangle her in the airport and on the plane. My plan was to exhaust her running around the airport so she might sit nicely in my lap. I was clearly living in a fantasy world. I knew that deep down, but I tried (probably not enough as those sitting near us on the plane can attest to) to let her run free while I closely followed her behind with the stroller and carry on bags. Abby is not a big crier at all and didn't cry even with my arms draped around her. She just wiggles and wiggles trying to wrestle free with a few Monica Seles grunts and groans thrown in. I didn't succeed in exhausting her but I sure succeeded in exhausting myself!

I didn't take many pictures (no real good excuse) this trip but my nieces took a million. They are so great with Abby. They put her on their myspace pages and show her off..it is so cute. She is so lucky to have them, and I know they will be good role models for her as she gets older. We had a great time, and Abby got so much attention from my family and my sister-in-law's family. My sister-in-law's parents are her "adopted" grandparents too which is great because you can never have too many people love you.

Abby and Ashtyn



It becomes clearer and clearer every day that dogs will be part of my life as Abby gets older. She is just crazy about dogs. I can't get over her love affair with them. She is so happy around them, and she is so good with them. I didn't expect her to be so gentle and sweet with them, but you can see for yourself by watching this brief video of Abby and Murphy. The video quality is very poor, but if you can deal with the darkness of the video, it is worth at least a few awwwwwws even from the hardened cynics out there...




We were only in West Texas for three days, but it was great to be with family. It is so much more enjoyable and fulfilling now having Abby as part of our family and celebrating her first Thanksgiving. Aside from the sunshine and daffodils, there were a few humorous and horrific moments I will remember about this Thanksgiving too.

Most "You Did Not Just Do That" Moment
Abby and I are lined up in Group A to board the plane back home standing at the post for people with numbers in the 40s. Our actual number is in the 20s, several spots up, but because I had Abby in the stroller and a few carry ons, I decided not to assert myself just to gain a few spots closer in line because it was pretty crowded up there. A man approaches, shows me his number and tells me that we are standing in his spot. I show him my number and tell him that I am in front of him anyway, so what is the big deal? He insists on OWNING the spot and ever so slightly nudges us aside. I told him he had a problem (I toned it down since Abby was there of course), and his logic was absent. Why did it matter to him if I was supposed to be in front of him anyway? He was just your garden variety jerk who then got embarrassed when I showed him how silly he was being.

Best "I Just Can't Let It Go" Moment
Abby and I boarded the plane and chose the vacant aisle seat right behind the man who insisted he stand at his assigned number post instead of 2 feet back. My only comment to him was "Nice seeing you again. I hope you enjoy my daughter". And, yes, Abby got a few kicks into his seat. Purely unintentional, I promise.

Most "Am I Fit to Parent?" Moment
Abby running away from me in the airport into a construction area and grabbing a handful of plaster out of a wall being remodeled and shoving it in her mouth. For a split second, I became an Olympic sprinter and managed to get to her and scoop it out before she swallowed.

Most "Embarrassing and Am I Fit to Parent? Combo" Moment
Abby running away from me into the men's bathroom. I got trapped behind a big group and couldn't get to her before she made it all the way into the men's bathroom only a few feet away from the urinals. I was mortified as there were several men in there. I apologized and Abby laughed. I don't think she was laughing at anything she saw, but better laughter than tears, at least for Abby. Maybe not so much for the men though.

Most "I Really Wanted to Laugh But It Would Have Been Socially Inappropriate To Do So" Moment
On the flight to West Texas, there happened to be about 5-6 kids close in age to Abby, so before the flight several of the kids, Abby included, were walking around the gate area eating crumbs out of each others strollers and the like. Abby reached into a woman's purse who was sitting next to a family I was talking to and pulled out a tampon that was in the very top of the purse! What can I say, Abby loves anything that makes a crinkling noise. And in our defense, wo puts a tampon that close to the opening of the purse? Put it in the zippered compartment where it belongs. Am I right??? It was so so hard to telll Abby no and not laugh especially as many of the people around were cracking up. One person was not cracking up. That was the tampon owner. And, she didn't really accept my apology either. Oh well. Such is life.

The Last Few Months

Forgive me Father for I have sinned. It has been over 2 months since my last blog. I'll say 3 Hail Marys..wait a minute. Wrong religion. Not mine. I do feel guilty though for not updating those of you who actually read this and have asked me about it. Where does the time go? Well, obviously it doesn't go to writing this blog, that is for sure. I'll try to recap some of the highlights over the past few months.

Abby is walking. She took her first real steps on October 27th. She had been taking a few quick steps between the wall and furniture, the furniture and me, etc. And, she had been holding on to my clothing as I walked. For almost 2 months, all Abby would do would be to just stand there and when I tried to get her to walk to me, she would just start clapping and looking at me as if I had grown horns. She just showed no real interest other than standing. She would stand. And stand. And stand until she grew roots.

Abby in Her Standing Phase

So, back to the starting walking thing. One day, when I went to pick Abby up from school, I walked into her classroom. I called out her name, and she was about 20 feet away from me sitting at a table eating her late afternoon snack. Her back was to me, but she turned her head when I called her name. Like she had done it a thousand times before, she stood up, scooted her chair back and walked 20 feet over to me and gave me a hug. It was awesome. Plain and simple. It was the most convincing case that Abby is truly a toddler now...for the most part, babyhood is in her rearview mirror (I haven't fully weaned her from the bottle..try as I might..she still likes a bottle in the AM. My rationale is that I want to make sure she gets enough milk every day, and she doesn't have a lot of dairy products at school. I can only really work on this on the weekends..Shh..don't tell anyone she is still taking a bottle ocassionally).

Abby moved out of the infant room at school into the young toddler room at the end of October. Thank goodness. She needed to be moved at least a month earlier, but they really want the kids to be walking before they move them. They made an exception in Abby's case because although her teachers like Ms. Regina, Ms. Russell, and Ms. Patricia LOVED her and told me so all the time (Abby even got her first teacher's comments for her baby book from Ms. Russell about how wonderful she was), Abby was into everything while the rest of the babies were pretty much blobs. Abby had started emptying every kid's dresser in the room (she loves opening drawers and taking out her clothes at home too), and I am sure the teachers got tired of refolding everything, so they decided to move her in with the other young toddlers who are in the 12-18 month age range like Abby. That classroom is way more her speed. There is lots of activity going on at all times. It is constant chaos, but that is what Abby likes. Everytime I pick her up, she is having an absolute ball climbing on things and playing with the other kids. When I drop her off in the morning, she starts smiling when we walk into school. Believe me, it makes me feel so much better each day knowing how much she truly enjoys her day.

A few weeks ago, I dressed her in her Texas Tech outfit (from her uncle Michael, a proud Tech alum) after Tech's huge win over #1 ranked Texas. When I picked Abby up that day from school, she was wearing a different outfit. This happens from time to time when lunchtime is particularly messy. On this day, another child smeared all of his lunch all over Abby. What was funny about it was that his parents were both Texas alums, so he took out his frustration over the outcome of the game on poor little Abby! Not to worry..the teachers said Abby just laughed about it.

Abby All "Teched" Out

Abby had her first haircut. I didn't want to cut her hair because it is so darn cute, but the fact is that it had gotten so long in front, you couldn't see her face. She had school pictures coming up which forced my hand, and she just got a little trim so you could see her beautiful face. She had a meltdown (and she rarely if ever has these) when she got her haircut. Abby cried and cried the entire time.

Thankfully, it was brief, and she forgot about it quickly after I "rewarded" her courage with a Diego phone (Diego of "Go, Diego, Go" fame on Nickelodeon channel is Abby's fave). Like most kids, she is mesmerized by phones, remotes and gadgets. So, this toy was a winner for many reasons.

Abby Talking to Grams About Her Day. Grams is Loud, so Abby Can't Put Phone Near Ear

Abby had her first Halloween. It was pretty uneventful. We had about 10 trick or treaters, but they all came well past Abby's bedtime. Abby goes to bed about 6:30 PM on weekdays because she naps very little at school. Abby enjoys her beauty sleep, that is for sure. She might make it to 7 PM ocassionally, but we didn't go trick or treating because (in no particular order) 1) sleep for her is way more important 2) she can't eat candy yet and 3) mom didn't want to. I did dress her up and take a few pictures. Since Abby loves dogs, I thought she would appreciate a puppy dog costume. Other than the fact that she was sweating profusely because Halloween was a warm day here and the costume was pretty heavy, Abby enjoyed the dressing up. It will be more fun in the years ahead when Abby can decide for herself what she wants to be for Halloween.

Every parent says "they grow up fast". I understand that perfectly. I really am enjoying all the different phases Abby is going through and trying to live in the moment with her as much as possible. Weekends with her are really our time together. She still loves the same things she always has - going to the park especially to get on the swing, playing with dogs, and riding/driving whatever she can. She gets such a focused, determined look on her face if you put her on a car, motorcycle, horse at the mall or Chuck-E-Cheese for example. I have to get her some kind of little car for Hannukah because the sheer joy and excitment you see on her face when she is riding/driving a car is priceless!

On a final, sad note, my father dumped me via voicemail during the Jewish High Holy Days because we had an argument which apparently turned out to be a dealbreaker for him. I tried to work it out with him and every time I called him back, he hung up on me. A few days after the argument, he left me a voicemail on Sunday at work (when he knew I wouldn't be there) and told me he wanted to be "incommunicado" with me for at least 2 years while he evaluated whether or not he wanted to have anything to do with me. Not only was his voicemail hateful and hurtful to me, he said some very derogatory things about my mother who had absolutely nothing to do with the argument whatsover. It was shocking to me how intense his hatred for my mother is even though it has been 30 years since they divorced. I am sad for myself and for Abby that she will never know her grandfather. My father has 3 grandchildren now, and he doesn't know any of them. Abby could never do or say anything to me where I would tell her to take a hike, no matter how much it might hurt at the time. That's a good thing. The day I listened to my father's message I was really down, and when I went to pick Abby up that day from school, she gave me a kiss. It might not seem like much, but almost every time I ask her for a kiss, she shakes her head no. This time, I didn't even ask, she just gave it to me. It is like she knew I needed it. It is amazing how intuitive kids can be sometimes.

First Birthday

Abby is one today. Wow, time has simply flown by since I brought her home 5 months ago. She had a fantastic birthday celebration with some of my closest friends over the Labor Day weekend. Abby and I packed up her portable highchair, carseat, stroller, two diaper bags, and one suitcase for a two day trip to North Carolina. The airlines picked a fine time to start charging fees to check bags. Lucky for me, some of the baby gear is EXEMPT, or I would have had to take out a 2nd mortgage before my trip! My college roommates from my junior year have been getting together almost once a year since we graduated (don't do the math..it is not pretty) to have a reunion of sorts. Some times we take a trip (just the girls), and other times, we just visit each other in one of the cities we live in. This time, we decided to visit Laura and her family in North Carolina and bring some of the kids and one of the husbands. We had a total of 12 staying at Laura's house. I think this was one of the best reunions we have had. It was probably because we included the kids, and they all got to meet Abby for the first time. I also think it was because I have really missed them lately. Every time I get together with them, I feel so fortunate to have had these three great women in my life for such a long period of time. Friends like these do not grow on trees. I am so lucky.

Abby and Lisa S.


The trip was just wonderful. Seeing my friends who all live in different states is always special. They opened their arms and hearts to Abby as did all of their children and husbands. The kids, other than Abby, were all within a few years of each other in age, and they had a great time with each other playing non-stop over the weekend. It was so great to see. I was so touched by the way the older kids treated Abby. Abby had her own entourage - Benjamin, Ryan, Caitlin, Aidan, and Kirby - who played with her, stroked her hair (gently of course..no one can get enough of Abby's hair!) strolled her, made her laugh, etc. They were adorable with her. It just made my heart sing. Caitlin and Aidan in particular could not get enough of Abby. Caitlin always wanted to hold her and touch her soft skin. She loved playing "mama" for a weekend, and she will make a great babysitter some day.

Abby and Caitlin

I thoroughly enjoyed getting to spend quality time with my friend's children. I feel like I have a much better appreciation for their wonderful little personalities. I have to say that all my friends are amazing parents which is evident just after being with their kiddos for a few minutes. They are great role models and sources of inspiration and advice for me as I tackle issues with Abby that they have already faced a few times (five times in one case!) with their own children. We spent an afternoon strolling around the Duke University campus which was a lot of fun because it is so pretty, and it was where my parents met and fell in love (although they did not live happily ever after with each other) when they were in college.


All of Us
Aidan and Abby
Duke Chapel


Aidan, Ryan, Caitlin, Kirby, Benjamin and Abby Duke University West Campus

Abby was treated like a rock star for her birthday. She got some fantastic presents that she loves already, and we had a little party as well. Abby is not really into sweets much (I am NOT complaining) and fiddled a bit with the cake before she palmed it with one hand and picked it up.

Abby and Caitlin Blowing Out Candle

Abby Meets Cake

Abby and Her Shadow/Idol, Caitlin

Hungry Ryan


Abby and Mom

Satisfied Abby

Abby and the Big Kids



There were always four or five of us taking pictures of Abby's every move as she pondered whether she would throw the cake or not (she didn't). And, the kids would not leave her side most of the time during the present opening phase.



I could hardly even see Abby to get a good picture since she was surrounded by her entourage! And, I felt like one of the papparazi with all the flashes going off!

Laura and her family have a wonderful golden retriever, Marley, who Abby adored. Abby crawled around on the floor with Marley and they played "cups" (exchanging plastic cups with each other). Marley enjoyed hanging around Abby hoping for morsels of food to drop at any time especially during the birthday party celebration. Abby had her own moist towlette (Marley's tongue) to clean off her hands which were full of cake and icing. It was really fun watching them together because Abby just flat out loves dogs. And, Marley was one of her favorites she has met so far. Marley licked her and walked over her, and Abby was so chill about it all. She is such a low maintenance baby in all respects (unless you are trying to hold her for a few hours on an airplane or something) and just goes with the flow.

Abby Riding Marley

Since we celebrated Abby's birthday a few days early while we were all together in North Carolina, it gave Grams and I a good reason to re-celebrate Abby's first birthday again on her real birthday. Grams brought over another cake and we had a toned down celebration at our house after work and school. Abby loves Grams' visits, and Grams bought her a great musical dancing tower that she can sit and play on now, and in a few months, she will be able to dance to the beat. It has a dancing bear on top of it that gives Abby all sorts of thrills. As usual, Grams knows what Abby likes. Probably because Grams is just a big kid herself when it comes to toys anyway! And, Abby's cousins and numerous friends called her and sang happy birthday to her as well. So much attention for one little baby, but she ate it up (the attention. the cake - not so much).

Abby's Birthday - Part 2 At Home with Mom and Grams

Dada?

I think every parent looks forward to those first words uttered by your child. Well, Abby's first word was.....are you ready for this....DADA!!! Now, this is only funny because there is no dada in the picture at all. I am sure it is just one of the easier words to say, but it is so ironic. Maybe she is asking me a question instead when she says it..who knows. Either way as a command, greeting or a question, it makes me laugh. Pretty much everything Abby does makes me laugh or smile anyway :) She is hilarious most of the time. She has had a great month and is transitioning from babyhood to toddlerhood each day.

Classic Abby - Smiling, Standing, Loving Life

Abby, Patty, and Patty's dog, Lucy

Abby has not shown a great interest in walking but can crawl at the speed of sound now! She loves standing and will push her walker (that doubles as a car with one minor adjustment) for brief periods, but she just likes to go fast, and walking must seem too slow for her.

She loves her car and likes to be pushed in it as fast as it can possibly go. I don't think "too fast" or "too high" is possible with Abby. She is a born thrillseeker..this much I know.

Abby went to her first birthday party a few weeks ago and had a blast at Chuck-E-Cheese. The party was for a 4 year old boy, but there were enough fun things to do for her, and she couldn't get enough of the 4 Wheel Drive Car that had a hydraulic lift on it. She humored me by riding in the slower, more pedestrian rides like the carousel and Clifford the Dog, but nothing beat the hot rod. See what I mean?

Abby - The Next Danica
Abby Loves Dogs - Even Big Metal Ones

Maddox's BDAY Party

Abby Enjoying a Meal At School

Abby @ 1O months

It has been 3 1/2 months since Abby came home, and we are just having a fantastic time. Abby has transitioned so well, it really blows my mind sometimes what a little trooper she is. Abby has been in daycare now about 6 weeks, and she really loves it. Everytime I pick her up at the end of the day, she looks like she is having so much fun climbing on things, crawling around, and pulling herself up whenever she can. Her caregivers say that Abby does not want to miss a thing that is going on which explains why she doesn't nap very much during the day! Frankly, I don't know how any one could sleep in a room full of 10 children between the ages of 6 and 12 months. It is definitely the highlight of my day to walk into her classroom and when I call her name, she looks up and crawls as fast as her little arms and legs will take her over to me. It is really the best feeling in the world especially after a long day at work. Daycare has been an adjustment because Abby has gotten picked up the sickness du jour at daycare which means she gets sent home. Leaving work, picking Abby up, getting her to the doctor who must write a note so that Abby can get back into school and then finding someone to to take care of her if she can't go back to daycare and I have to work, has been a bit rough. It is only rough because I only have a few days off left for the year (I took all my vacation and personal time to be with Abby for a few months when I first brought her home), and my boss is not so cool with allowing me to telecommute (don't get me started). But, Abby will eventually build up some immunities, and in 2009, I will have plenty of time off from work, so it will be a non-issue next year.

At Abby's last wellness check up at 9 months, she had grown quite a bit and is in the 10% for her age group in height, and the 8% in weight. Believe me, the only thing small about Abby is her stature. She has a big personality, a loud (but cute) voice, and the biggest grin you have ever seen.

Almost every morning, Abby wakes up smiling so big and is so excited to start her day. She starts jumping up and down, and when I pick her up, she continually flashes her big grin at me. I love it. I just never imagined having a child that was this excited to get up in the morning. Me on the other hand..don't bother me until 10 AM. I might be in a decent mood by then. I have to say that Abby has already changed this about me to some extent, and that is a great thing!

Abby's typical weekend is swimming, going to the park, and taking music classes. She still loves the water and being in control of her own little boat. This is great because temperatures here are already at 100 degrees, so staying cool is a must.

Abby Modeling Her New Bikini

Abby in the Bucket Swing

We take Music Together classes every Sunday morning, and there are 3 other babies the same age as Abby in addition to other children between 1 and 7 or so. Abby really enjoys the classes and her eyes are glued to the teacher most of the time becaue the teacher is very animated and demonstrative. I hope this is a precursor of things to come with other teachers when she starts school! The classes afford me an opportunity to act silly dancing and singing with Abby. I didn't think I would enjoy them as much as I do, but it is nice to be in a place where I can behave in a silly manner and not care about what anyone else thinks especially if you lined up 100 people and asked them to sing and dance, I would rank 100th in both categories. I saw myself dancing on a friend's wedding video once. Scariest thing I had ever seen. And, I am not kidding.

Abby is constantly pulling herself up but isn't really trying to walk around holding on to furniture, tables, etc. much yet. She mostly pulls herself up (the gate on the stairs is her favorite) and looks over at me to see if I am watching then bursts out into laughter.

This is the best reality show I could watch. I never get tired of it. I am still awed by Abby on a daily basis mostly because she is just so interested in all of her surroundings at all times. She is not going to miss anything!

Abby Jammin' Out on Her Keyboard